Thursday, April 27, 2006

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Carbage collection

Check out the fantastic collection of Carbage on TopGear




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Infidelity test

I guess Hillary Clinton was a big customer...




Do you suffer from the nightmare of suspicion and doubt caused by the  infidelity of a cheating spouse? Find out  what's really going on, the quick and easy  way with the CheckMate 5 Minute Infidelity Test Kit.™
The CheckMate 5 Minute Infidelity Test Kit is the patented home use semen detection test kit that tells you "what's really going on" by detecting traces of dried semen that can be found in underwear after sex.
...
It's like having your own C.S.I. in a box. The quick and easy CheckMate 5 Minute Infidelity Test Kit is designed specifically for use in the home by untrained consumes and comes with complete instructions and toll free customer support. She brings the evidence home to you without even knowing it. Find out what's really going on today with the CheckMate 5 Minute Infidelity Test Kit.


Via  The Red Ferret Journal

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The most frequently stolen traffic sign

Fucking, Austria is a small town with about 150 people. A lot of public funds have been spent on replacing the signs through the years so they now have “theft proof“ signs welded to steel and secured in cement.


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Remote control for changing traffic lights

The device we have all been wishing for when we're stuck in traffic: a device that can change stop lights from red to green.:



A man who said he bought a device that allowed him to change stop lights from red to green received a $50 ticket for suspicion of interfering with a traffic signal.


...


Niccum was issued a citation March 29 after police said they found him using a strobe-like device to change traffic signals. Police confiscated the device.


"I'm always running late," police quoted Niccum as saying in an incident report.


The device, called an Opticon, is similar to what firefighters use to change lights when they respond to emergencies. It emits an infrared pulse that receivers on the traffic lights pick up.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

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Big Bunny

Meet Herman., the 3 feet tall bunny:




"I don't feed him an unusual diet," said Wagner. "He goes through more than his brothers and sisters, but he eats the same food mix. His favorite food is actually lettuce. He can never get enough of it."


Herr Hare is unusual in another way, he noted. "Unlike some other rabbits I've had, he’s really a gentle character — a gentle giant."  

Saturday, April 15, 2006

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The worst crap you can buy on the net

Looking for the worst products and services for sale on the internet? Crap.com is the internet guide to all the crap you can buy on the internet:



More and more people are relying on the Internet to purchase products and services. Unfortunately, there are literally hundreds -- if not thousands -- of websites purporting to offer crappy stuff.


Crap.com is a unique place where we bring together only the creme de la creme of the crap on the net. A showcase of super information highway crap-du-jour, if you will. Updated every seven days, come here to see what's hot in crap.


We hope it will make your Internet shopping experience  a more successful one.

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The 2010 olympics in Canada

I hope the Olympics in Vancouver will be better than the one in Torino but it doesn't look the best judging by this Q&A:



Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics these are some questions people the world over are asking!!!! Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website (frightening, isn't it!)


Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.


Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.


Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.


Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.


Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
A: Let's not touch this one.


Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?


Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.


Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.


Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.


Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.


Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A: No, WE don't stink.


Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in Canada? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.


Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.


Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A: Only at Thanksgiving.


Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.


Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.


Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.


:-)

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

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A crap ride

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Brazillian soldiers?

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing.
He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."


"OH NO!" the president exclaims. "That's terrible!"
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the president sits, head in hands.


Finally, the president looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"

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Staying in bed shouting oh God!...

Staying in bed shouting oh God!
does not constitue going to church


 


Via Digital Fog